'Positive criticism’, Being ‘good sports’, Critics choice awards …. All terms we have used to spin criticism in a positive light. Let's be real though, when you are on the receiving end of the criticism ---- it’s not that easy being vulnerable. Sometimes it hurts, and while it could be helpful, let's face it, some criticisms are pointless.
My brothers teased me endlessly (as a kid) about how defensive I was when criticized, they called me ‘Voltron' lol. It’s still not easy to be criticized but I have learned some lessons on handling criticism.
Here are some of my quick tips
Remember this very important note: A criticism doesn’t define you. It doesn’t predict how successful you would be. It’s just an opinion. It’s feedback that you can choose to give power to … or not. So don’t take it personal, ever. Just use it. Like a tool.
Develop the right mindset to deal:
Always remind yourself that everyone has an opinion and while you are not in control of what they think or say, you are in control of what to accept/receive and how to respond.
You are responsible for protecting yourself. The same way you wouldn’t let any random person come in and take a dump in your room, don’t let that happen to your mind.
Be open minded and willing to learn, and treat criticism as a drive/force for excellence.
Consider the source of the criticism:
Is this coming from someone you trust? Someone that cares about you?
Is this coming from someone that is qualified to give that kind of feedback? Someone you care about their opinion?
Is the delivery framed to hurt or help?
Receive (or reject) accordingly: With the analysis, mindset and source as anchor, follow the decision path below to handle criticism
Is it true? (No – reject and keep it moving. Yes – Move to next question)
Is there something to learn? (No – reject and keep it moving. Yes – Next question)
Is there value in what you learned (No – reject and keep moving. Yes – Accept and apply as needed)
We are vulnerable beings and its natural to care about what others think, but I find that with the right mindset, an open mind, good sense of humor and practicing the above, I am learning to ignore and reject things that kill my spirit while recognizing how and when best to turn criticism into victories.